Thursday, October 23, 2008
My Prayer Language
During my college days, I used to swim regularly. Coincidentally, it was during that time that I felt what I considered God's calling (for priesthood). I was a Computer Engineering student, and mixing computer and religion for me was quite too tough a thing to do at that time. It was confusing. And then it was during one of my swimming sessions that I decided to swim myself to complete exhaustion. It was night and was raining hard. The resort was almost empty. I was all by myself. The idea was to put myself in a situation that if somethings goes wrong, there will be no one to rely on but God alone; to eliminate other wordly thoughts, but only of God and His Words. It was like a simulation of a real life problem. I wanted to prove to God that as I would strive to keep myself afloat despite fatigue and fight the threat of drowning, I would stick or cling to Him no matter what. It was terribly difficult because when it's time to raise my head above water to breath, rainwater would fill my face making the chances to breath more difficult. But as I went on, I noticed something terribly amazing that surprised me - in the middle of it all, I noticed that it was easier under water than above it. I felt I didn't have to worry too much about moving briskly to stay afloat simply because I was enjoying more being under water. And I noticed I wanted to stay under water longer than staying over. While the rain was still pouring wildly on the surface, I found peace under the splashes. I felt a unique kind of peacefulness that in a way I really felt I had successfully made my message across to God. I felt I was really able to make God belive in me, and that I love Him. I was counting the laps I was doing because I was also trying to say Hail Mary and Our Father. It came to a point that I was like in a middle of the ocean, far from land and all I could see was water, but I did not stop until I was really almost out of air. Guess what, I never realized that I had set a record for myself in swimming, having swam almost 20 laps (at least). I made it.... survived it.... I dared the dangerous and God saw me through.... I was thankful because there was really no real serious problem in my life or in my family, so I made one serious situation for me. It was like an act, so I could talk to God the way the "beaten but heroic people" had done. Then finally, I personally confirmed an old thought that as the bouyance power of the water is often so hardly believable, so is God's power sometimes. But in all eternity - God is there. We simply have to trust him just as we should the bouyancy of water. Well, I did not become a priest although I tried to enter a seminary. I am now an IT professional, happily married, and a father of one.